Samara's Corner

At the swim club I made a candy necklace and a real necklace. I went off the diving board. I saw: Sandy, Steven, and Ashlyn. I played ping pong. I went to a magic show. I petted a bunny and fed him dandelions. I got a certificate from the magician.

Marilyn's Note: Since everyone who read Sami's blog wanted to try the corn muffins, including Sami's Daddy, Sami wanted to post the recipe we used. Her Saba was kind enough to OCR most of it from the Good Housekeeping Cookbook with some modifications of our own.

Blueberry Blue Cornmeal Muffins

1-1/4 cups sifted all purpose flour
¾ cup blue corn meal
4 Tbsp. granulated sugar
4-1/2 tsp. double-acting baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1 extra-large egg
1 cup buttermilk
1/3 cup melted butter
1 cup sugared fresh blueberries
non-stick cooking spray

1. Start heating oven to 425°F. Spray a muffin/cupcake pan with non-stick cooking spray.
2. Into a medium bowl, sift flour, corn meal, sugar, baking powder, and salt.
3. In a small bowl, beat the egg well with a fork; stir in buttermilk, butter; pour, all at once, into flour mixture, stirring with fork until flour is just moistened. (Even if mixture is lumpy, do not stir any longer or holes or tunnels in corn bread will result.)
4. Gently stir in blueberries.
5. Use an ice cream scoop to divide batter into greased pan.
6. Bake 20 to 25 min., or until done. Serve hot. Makes 12 muffins.

A Heavy Heart

Saul and I were supposed to have fasting checkups with our doctor on Monday afternoon. We had already rescheduled these appointments twice because we had mixed up dates. We arose early to make sure we had finished light breakfasts by 8:00 a.m. to allow us 6-hour fasts as we were told to do. At 10, the doctor's office called to cancel the appointment. Our doctor's wife had gone into labor that morning and was delivering their baby.

Adele came over unexpectedly to take Mom to the bank and to wash and set Mom's hair. She said that Mom probably had not told us she was coming because she was still angry about someone coming into the house to look after her while we are away on vacation. While they were at the bank, I called Aunt Ruth to see if she would consider taking some time off in light of her recent hospitalization to come and stay with Mom. I found that she is planning to go back to work on Thursday. While Adele was here, we sent the girls to take an early nap and we took the opportunity to take a drive together to deliver some work I had done. The weather has been so weird! On the way back, we encountered some of the heaviest rain I have ever seen, but by the time we arrived home, it had barely rained here. We all had a large lunch with the leftovers from Friday evening's barbecue.

In the afternoon, we took the girls to the movies to see Kung Fu Panda. They both really enjoyed it and so did the two of us. I am so happy that the theaters have made real buttered popcorn available again! I haven't been able to really enjoy movie popcorn since I was in my teens. I made a spaghetti dinner when we returned and we spent extra time putting the girls to bed.

Yesterday, we spent a delightful afternoon at Beachcombers, showered, made omelets for dinner and took the girls to a magic show in a secluded local park which we never knew existed. The girls were delighted with the show and were able to pat the bunny the magician pulled out of his hat at the climax.

Yesterday morning, I called Leslie Fine in the morning to tell her that we would decide about the help for Mom by evening. It really is not fair to keep her hanging any longer besides the fact that, at this point in time, she may not even be able to line someone up. Then, I put in a call to both Adele and Ken. Larry said he would have Adele call me back. She didn't call all day yesterday and by evening, after putting the kids to bed, I was too tired to make any phone calls. When I called Ken at the office, they told me he was at home. He had stayed home for several reasons. He has a cold and a sore throat, he was meeting some contractors to redo his finished basement which had flooded, and Randi had taken her father for cataract surgery. He also said he would call back, but I assume he was a bit overwhelmed yesterday. So this morning, I will be calling Leslie to cancel. I have very mixed feelings about all this. I feel that everyone around me has tried their best to be supportive, but they all have their own lives and routines and are as overwhelmed as I am with this situation. I understand Mom's resistance to having an expensive stranger in the house to take care of her. She has always been fiercely independent and this represents a severe challenge to her self image and an admission of infirmity. On the other hand, I am also angry that she has not held up her part of the bargain when we built this house that, when and if the time came, we would care for her here with help rather than send her to a nursing home. So here I sit, wavering between sympathy and anger. I feel that she has decided that she would rather die than accept help in her daily routine. That is a person's prerogative. When Uncle Jack was dying in the hospital and I urged him to fight and assured him that he could come and stay with me again, he told me he didn't think his future quality of life would make the fight worthwhile. I have never been in this position, thank God, so I don't know what I would do under the same circumstances. In the meantime, I will take the next few days to prepare for a vacation that I will take with a heavy heart.

Samara's Corner

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In the last 2 weeks I:

I lost my tooth. I took swimming lessons. I saw the movie “WALL-E." "WALL-E" was about a little robot discovering Earth! I made a new necklace for Saba with little beads! I MADE BREAKFAST FOR BETH!!! I made BLUE-blueberry corn muffins, fruit salad, poi pancakes, peach jelly, and no-pulp orange juice. We went to see the movie “Kung Fu Panda," which was about a noodle-seller dragon warrior!!! And we had a bed-time story about Shmuel the delivery boy!!! It was also about Shmuel’s sister, and how Shmuel taught a history class about Israel to meet Marilyn. Another bedtime story from the book, Samantha, was about a cat statue from China named Crow-Chin-Pantha!!!

A Breakfast, a Funeral and the Pool

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Sami's breakfast was wonderful! While I was finishing up my blog yesterday, Saul helped the girls set the table, fixed up my wonderful modular Dacor cooktop with the griddle insert and found a bag of blue cornmeal in the pantry closet. Sami and Izzy had consulted the night before and had decided to prepare the poi pancakes from the mix that Beth had brought back from Hawaii for us. Our own supply of the mix from previous trips and mail order had been exhausted. The price has gone up so much for shipping now that I suppose we will have to forgo ordering it in the future. Sami had picked out the fruit that was going into the fruit salad they had decided to make the evening before at Wegman's which included a mango, peaches, cherries, plums, strawberries, and pink lady apples. Saul taught Sami how to make melon balls from our leftover wedge of watermelon and she later learned how to pit the cherries as well.

When I came into the kitchen, we began by making blueberry blue corn muffins. I am teaching the girls fractions with our measuring cups and spoons. They took turns measuring, leveling, sifting, cracking eggs and spraying the pan. The blueberries from Costco are the largest and best I have ever seen. Beth came over when the muffins had just gone into the oven, helped put maple syrup, orange juice, etc. on the table, and took Izzy back with her to help give her dogs a bath. Haley and Eric were borrowing her dog, Yenta, for a few days to see if Haley could tolerate Yenta's hair with her allergies. They want to have a dog, but know for sure that Haley is allergic to Darcy. I warmed up and buttered the griddle, mixed up the poi pancake batter, and ladled the pancakes onto the grill. Then, I helped Saul and Sami finish up the fruit salad. I broke out my last jar of homemade peach preserves, made from Laurel Molen's gift of a case of peaches last year, to spread on the muffins.

Beth was done with the dogs by the time the muffins had finished and we all had a warm, delicious breakfast. Sami even had time to write her menu on our bulletin board. We had found a fruit at Wegman's that none of us had ever seen before called a black velvet apricot. We cut it into pieces to share and said the shehecheyanu over it. It was juicy and delicious. Saul snapped a picture of himself when we commented that he would not be in the photos.

During breakfast, we discussed catching a movie in the afternoon. For a moment, we had completely forgotten about Saul's plans to attend the funeral of Paul's Aunt Henrietta. He had learned about her death from an email notice from our old synagogue and from our friend, Larry Shipper. No notice had appeared in the paper. Saul had decided to attend the funeral with Larry as we all had known Henrietta for many years and greatly admired and respected her for her warm, practical, and down-to-earth nature. By attending the funeral, Saul was able to see his mother, sister, and niece for the first time since October of last year. His mother looks well and was very happy to see him. His sister acknowledged his presence and when he commented on the fact that his niece was avoiding him, sent her over to say hello. Paul did not acknowledge him, but Saul went over to him at the end to offer condolences. Henrietta's son's family and the rest of Paul's family were all very warm and welcoming. In the end, seeing his family and his mother in good health was a relief.

While he was attending the funeral, I cleaned up the kitchen while the girls played upstairs with their toys and dollhouse. Ari had called to say that he was stopping by with his friend, Zach, on his way back to DC from Matt Katz's bachelor party this weekend in the Poconos. Ari was very amused when I commented that Zach looked very different with short-cropped hair. As it turns out, the Zach with the long curly mop of hair whom I have met twice, is a different Zach. Ari and Zach had a bite to eat and continued on to DC. Haley and Eric stopped in see Grandmom for a few minutes while they were picking up their borrowed dog and shortly after, Saul returned from the funeral.

The girls seemed so tired that we sent them to bed to nap for an hour at 2:00 p.m. Of course, they insisted that they weren't tired. We tried to wake them at 3:15, 3:30, and then finally insisted they get up at 3:45 p.m. The weather had cleared up considerably and we decided to go to the pool. It turned out to be a delightful afternoon. Sami had her first swimming lesson and found many kids with whom she and Izzy could play. We lingered until 6:45 p.m. and then went home for showers, leftover pizza, and movies in our bed.

July 4th Independence Weekend

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I did go back to bed and slept for about an hour on Thursday morning. I had to laugh to see that my Google ad for the "Tired" entry was for a cure for insomnia. Adele called at about 9:30 a.m. to say that she and Larry had picked up Aunt Ruth about 1:30 a.m. and taken her to Abington Hospital. Aunt Ruth, who still works full time for the Supreme Court of Pennsylvania, had suddenly become violently ill with vomiting and diarrhea, and had fallen on the way to the bathroom, bruising herself terribly in the effort to pull herself up. She convinced Adele to take her to the hospital rather than call an ambulance because she believed the ambulance would only take her to another hospital. Adele and Larry stayed with her in the emergency room for a few hours until she was feeling better and all was under control. Then they drove home and went back to sleep. Aunt Ruth had heart surgery several years ago and I was hospitalized with a blood clot on the day I was supposed to bring her home to my house to recover. She had waited with the surgery until Mom had sufficiently recovered from her second hip replacement. The three of us spent a few weeks together here being pricked by vampires (nice nurses, really) while we all recuperated. So the doctors were very concerned with the effect the severe dehydration she experienced might have on her heart. Each day since Thursday, she thought she would be coming home, but Mom spoke with her last night and they were still holding her. Perhaps today they will release her. She says she has been feeling okay since being rehydrated. There also has been a question, nationally, about salmonella in the food supply. At first the authorities thought that tomatoes were suspect, but now they are not sure from where the contamination might be coming. Three other people came into the hospital with the same symptoms. Because the symptoms ceased after one awful night, however, they appear to be viral rather than bacterial.

The weather looked very iffy and we decided not to go to the pool. After we all put the house in order, Saul made Mom and the girls fruit and yoghurt smoothies for lunch and we headed out for Philadelphia's Constitution Center which was supposed to have special activities for children on the third and fourth. We luckily found a metered street parking space almost across the street from the special building where the Liberty Bell is housed. When we parked at 1:45 p.m. we put 2 hours worth of coins in the meter. The line of people waiting to file past the Liberty Bell was a block long so we immediately walked the two blocks to the Constitution Center which was supposed to have activities for children at 2:00 p.m. After our experiences with Port Discovery in Baltimore, our expectations were probably too high. We were ushered into a special theater with a wordy film presentation much too long for a 4-year-old. The girls were given cards to be punched for each activity which, when filled, would entitle them to free ice cream. The floor exhibits, like the film were not really suitable for young children. There was a small station set up for them to craft star wands. After that we entered a hall of bronze statues of the signers of the Declaration of Independence posed as though they were in the process of developing the document. Once they realized it was okay touch the statues, the girls got into various poses for photographs with them. The other activity involved singing a patriotic song with a karaoke machine, but the song Sami was given was so obscure that she was unfamiliar with the music. The final station involved receiving temporary patriotic tattoos on their hands. They made us promise not to tell Daddy, whom they know disapproves of tattoos. We filled our card and went to the cafeteria to claim our free ice cream. The girls chose vanilla ice cream sandwiches from a case and after they ate them, we exited from the cafeteria.

We walked back through the visitor's center where the girls were fascinated by a holographic image of the Liberty Bell that appeared to be ringing if you shifted your weight from one foot to the other. The real Liberty Bell still had a long line, but we were amazed to find a window in the building through which the Bell was perfectly visible. Why anyone would wait for an hour on a hot day just to file past it is a mystery to me. We returned to the car with 10 minutes to spare and headed home. Because of the traffic, we decided to take Broad Street. We pointed out Temple University where Saul and I both graduated. Then I had the idea of driving through my old neighborhood by way of the route of the C Bus down Rising Sun Avenue. The girls had been asking questions about the home where I had grown up and I decided we would take a photograph to show to Mom. I also wanted to avoid the area of Broad Street where my friend, Sandy Schinfeld, had been killed by a drunk driver a few months ago. The drive looked mostly the same, although Feraco's Pizza where Saul and I would have late dates is no longer there. Hunting Park was filled with people picnicking. The house looks so different with its yellow-painted stone and yellow aluminum siding that I only recognized it by the street address on the house next door. The enormous leafy sycamore trees that used to line the streets were all gone.


We finished up the leftovers for dinner when we arrived home and eventually headed out to see the fireworks at Wissahickon High School's field. The traffic leaving turned a 10-minute drive into one that took an hour. We packed the girls, who fell asleep on the ride home, into bed and went to sleep ourselves.

Friday, we picked up Larry Shipper, had lunch out at a buffet in Abington, and drove to the Warrington Movie theater to catch the movie "WALL-E." We all liked it very much and Izzy actually sat through the whole movie. When we returned home around 4:00 p.m., Saul barbecued hot dogs, hamburgers, chicken and Moroccan sausages while I made pasta salad, beans, fried onions and various other accompaniments for Shabbat dinner. Faith Rubin joined us, as well as Beth, and we had a wonderful dinner, finishing with chocolate cake and oatmeal, peanut butter, raisin cookies I had taken out of the freezer along with Faith's blonde brownies. Izzy, when she woke up from napping, squeezed lemons and limes on the juicer and we made pink lemonade with some pomegranate and grape juice. Sami, who woke up a little bit later, was annoyed that she did not get to participate, so Beth told her she could make her lunch on Saturday. After services on Saturday, at which Sami and Izzy led Alaynu and Adon Olam, Sami was not satisfied with merely warming leftovers in the microwave, so this morning, I will be helping them to prepare breakfast for Beth. Last night, we headed out to Peddlar's Village after napping for a festival and fireworks. By the time we arrived there, it was pouring and after waiting a while to see if the rain would let up, we gave up. On the way home, we had dinner at Wegman's and bought some supplies for breakfast this morning.

Tired

The whole experience of dealing with Mom on Tuesday evening was extremely upsetting to all of us. Saul and I both slept fitfully Tuesday night. He had nightmares about his mother, sister, and brother-in-law as he did for a while when his uncomfortable situation first occurred. Unfortunately, as rational as the mind can be about a situation, in dreams the subconscious takes over. I also had bad dreams, though more non-specific. Since I wasn't sleeping well anyway, I arose and wrote my blog yesterday in the wee hours of the morning as I am today and was able to head off the girls at 7:30 a.m. when they came to wake us. Saul was up shortly after that anyway.

When Mom joined us in the kitchen during breakfast, she waved me off with her hand when I wished her a good morning and wouldn't speak to me. Saul got the same treatment. She took her pills, drank some orange juice, and then made her oatmeal and left it sitting on the table and went back to her room. She didn't come back to eat her oatmeal until we all had left the table to get out of our pajamas. Saul and I decided we should get out of the house for most of the day. He checked the Net for activities while I was on the phone speaking to various people who called me in the morning--Roxy, Leslie Fine, and Adele.

Leslie discussed Mom's resistance to having someone stay with her for the two weeks and suggested that perhaps a relative or someone else known by the family could stay and keep an eye on her. The real issue is her diabetes and the fact that falling asleep and not eating for an extended period of time (even 6 or 7 hours during the day) could send her into a diabetic coma. I told Leslie that if that option had been available, I would not have contacted her. I asked her not to count us out yet while Ken, Adele and I work on the situation. She has been understanding.

We had a number of errands to do. I needed to return a few of the shirts I had bought at Marshall's in DC which had been mismarked as far as size. Saul needed to pay a visit to Chestnut Hill College to deliver his signed contract and other papers having to do with his medical plan. The girls were very impressed with the castle-like appearance of the college and wanted to go down every hallway to see where it led. We humored them for a while and also introduced them to some of Saul's colleagues and friends who made a fuss over them and plied them with lollipops.

By the time we finished, it was lunchtime and we took them to the King Buffet in Plymouth Meeting Mall so that they could eat their fill of sushi and ice cream, their favorite foods. The buffet is very inexpensive and we definitely get our money's worth in the beautiful assortment of sushi. We had planned to take a trip to the Sturgis Pretzel Factory in Lititz for the afternoon, but realized at lunch that the girls were too tired to stay awake on the ride home and we were just as exhausted. They both took a two-hour nap and so did we. Mom's door was closed when we arrived home and we decided not to disturb her. It appeared that she had eaten lunch. When the girls awakened us at 4 p.m. we pushed ourselves out of bed to get in some time at the pool. Wednesday afternoons are for clay and Sami lives for clay. Unfortunately, by the time we arrived, the clay teacher was getting ready to finish up. They had to content themselves with the pool. Sami decided to try to pass her deep-water test. One of the lifeguards, Amy, who has just been wonderful with the girls, was available to test her. She didn't pass mainly due to a lack of coordinated technique. We arranged with Amy to give Sami some private swimming lessons when she is available at $15 for a half hour.

Ken called on my cell while we were at the pool to discuss the situation with Mom and for once seems stymied as to how to proceed. I am sure he will come up with a plan, though, and implement it in some way. His great strength lies in doing just that.

We returned home by 6:15 p.m. and I helped the girls shower while Saul showered and got dressed to drive to the synagogue for a board meeting. Jerry and Betty Weiss, whom he was driving to the meeting, arrived early and met the girls as I was preparing dinner. While I was helping them shower, Mom came into the room to ask if they had had dinner yet. I told her I would be preparing dinner when I finished with them. We had leftover soup and fish and I made some tortellini as well. Mom chatted casually through dinner as though nothing had happened. I can't tell if she has forgotten her anger, has decided she has won her point, or has received a "dressing-down" on the phone from Adele or Ken.

Ari called during dinner wanting to discuss the previous night's meeting and I told him I would call back later. He had an interesting day as he had to sneak into his office through a garage entrance. There had been a bomb threat at the World Bank which is close by the building where he works near the White House. The authorities had closed off a three-block radius while they investigated for several hours, but he was able to get back in by accessing a garage that was just outside the closed off area. I had promised the girls a movie night after dinner which meant curling up with me in my bed to watch The Jetson's movie I had recorded for them on TiVo. Then, I sent them to their room and read them another chapter of Samantha. Sami called Alex on her cell phone and found out that Jessica had bought a new car, a hybrid Mazda. I will get more details today, I am sure. Izzy spoke with him, also. By the time I finished tucking them in at 8:30 p.m., I was too tired to clean up the dishes, too tired to finish the brisket, and too tired to call Ari back. When Saul returned at 10 p.m., I awoke briefly, we spoke a few words, and I fell back asleep.

It is 5:30 a.m. and now that my blog is finished I will try to go back to bed for two hours. Then, I hope to clean up the kitchen and finish the brisket. After that, who knows?

Monday and Tuesday at Beachcombers

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Monday morning was spent shopping to replenish our diminishing food supplies. We had just enough milk for Mom to make her oatmeal and the girls to have cereal. Saul took the breakfast detail so I could catch a few more winks after blogging until 2 in the morning. You Tube was not cooperating. From now on, if I post a blog before it is finished, I will place an "under construction" sign at the top until it is completely finished. I was afraid of losing my postings from Ari's because his network shuts down every so often, so I kept on publishing all through the process. Some of you may have seen an unfinished blog from Friday because it took a few hours to completely get it together.

We spent the entire afternoon at Beachcombers Swim Club. They had just sent out an e-mail saying that the club was having a financial struggle and there was buzz among the regulars about it because a piece of the land had been sold off and is in the process of becoming a strip mall. Yesterday, we heard that things are okay for this summer, but its survival into the future is in question. We have only been members for three years, but for some, this is a summer institution that has been a major part of their lives.

Beth joined us for dinner Monday evening. I had bought a beautiful piece of halibut at Costco that I thought we would grill, but Saul was too tired so I pan steamed it with shallots, lemon and fresh herbs from the garden. I used up my potatoes that had been around for a while by making potato, leek and corn soup and warm potato salad. Beth was freaked out because over the weekend, her german shepherd, Darcy, had learned to hunt successfully and had killed a large groundhog that she described as not even fitting in her trash bag. When Saul went out to water our potted plants before dinner, he heard Beth shriek and went running over. Darcy had pounced on a rabbit and killed it almost immediately as soon as Beth let her out of the house. Beth loves all animals. Her two dogs were the neediest in the pound when she adopted them. This is very upsetting to her, but Saul and I are celebrating the fact that Darcy has learned to hunt and we might actually have a garden again with real tomatoes on plants that have not been nibbled to the nub. We finished our meal with ice cream and let the girls make their own sundaes. Everyone went to bed early.

Yesterday morning was spent unpacking and cleaning up. I had taken the whole brisket from Simon's Kosher Meat out of the freezer to defrost. I separated the two cuts and pot roasted the first cut. The second cut went into a pot to boil and will become two dishes--beef and barley soup, and barbecue beef. Once sliced and finished today, I will freeze everything to take with us for our two-week vacation in Ocean City, NJ.

I promised the girls we would take them to the pool if they napped. They have not been waking us up before 7:30 a.m., but I have no idea, now, what time they awaken and begin watching t.v. in their room. They seem pretty ready for a nap by 12 or 1 p.m. They both slept for about 2 hours and we took them to the pool for an hour. Sami decided not to swim and enjoyed herself with the Play-Doh activity that was ongoing through the afternoon.

My brother, Ken, arrived at 5:30 p.m. bearing three large pizzas to await our 6:30 p.m. appointment with Leslie Fine of Fine Care to discuss live-in help for Mom while we are on vacation. Adele joined us a few minutes later with her granddaughter, Brenna, so that the cousins could play together. Then Beth joined us, and then Randi, Ken's wife. As usual when we get together, we had a great time. When Leslie arrived and began her pitch at the kitchen table, we were all impressed except for Mom, who was feeling much better and therefore was annoyed at the slightest hint that she might not be able to take care of herself while we are away. The expense is very great--$225.00 per day for a live-in person and because Abington Hospital had not thought Mom needed any specialized nursing care when she was released from the hospital, none of it will be subsidized. Eventually, we all had to stop pushing Mom to accept this situation and Ken offered to have her over to his house for the two weeks where she will be on one floor and have a bathroom to herself, but that is unacceptable to her also. We still have a week to discuss this, and when Leslie talked to Mom privately, she felt that she might come around. If her strength returns, maybe all this will be okay and she will be able to fend for herself. Here's hoping!